After a Divorce Moving on to a new Life
I was with my husband for 20 years before he dropped the bomb on me. I never in a million years expected it no way no how. I have 2 sons with him both grown now. But again never saw it coming. On my 35th birthday he gave me the papers. He had filed in May of 2000 and gave them to me in September 2000 on my birthday as I said. I was broken, confused and hurt. I did not know what to do or where to turn. I had 2 sons to care for and with my income was impossible to do. I had to let my apartment go and all our belongings. I moved in with my Mom and Dad. I took on 3 jobs 2 were part-time. Just to feed my kids and pay my Mom and give my kids lunch money. They never had the designer clothes and shoes, never got to go the mall to shop and hang out. They at age 16 each got part time jobs too to help out. Not one cent did my ex pay and he was suppose to pay child support. I did not have money for a lawyer so he got away with it. Now after 7 years I have since remarried to my true prince charming and happy once again. But now my children suffer. They go from place to place and feel as if they have no home. I want them to live with me and my husband and we both have offered time and again. But, they feel if they do it will hurt their Dad. He after the divorce married the woman he left me for. I talk to him cordially and try to be nice. But with all that was done and said it still hurts. I don’t think I will ever be able to forgive. I just wish he would tell our children it is okay to be with me since he does not want them with him. I have tried numerous times to coax the boys here and sway them with well wishes and such. I have all but promised them the moon. I can not speak ill of their father in front of them nor tell them the whole truth. I do not want my children to hate their father and have hatred in their hearts for him and their step mom. But, what am I suppose to do? Carry on and pretend all is well. Keep hurting secretly that my children are miserable? well, you tell me what would you do?