Get Past Issues in Your Marriage Before it Falls Apart
Your marriage is on the rocks and you don’t know what to do so you turn to every resource that you can possibly find but haven’t been able to find anything that actually worth trying. I have come a long way since I first stepped foot into my marriage. I have found a lot of things that work and things that don’t work but one thing that I have found is that a marriage can be repaired no matter how much in the gutter that it might seem.
I can’t say that I am an expert in marriage although I have ready nearly everything under the sun that I could get my hands on about marriage. I have a happy marriage and I often help those who are having trouble in their marriage by giving them advice and then I later ask how that advice went to see if it made any impact on their relationship at all. I am a thinker and sometimes it tends to get me into trouble but more often I do find ways to help those who need help through my advice.
I am a big fan of Oprah Winfrey and the latest show that I watched had to do with cheating spouses. The show went on to say that most men cheat because their wives aren’t giving them something that they desire. This got me thinking about all the times that I have heard a guy say that he cheated because his wife shows him no affection or she won’t have sex with him. The same goes for many women. Women often cheat because someone makes them feel special and they long for this. I am not saying that this is an excuse for them to cheat and some people do find it adventurous just to say that they cheated and got away with it. Anyways, if you have a cheating spouse and want to repair your marriage you should start to think about why they would have cheated in the first place. If you can’t figure it out then ask them why and I am sure that they will tell you. If they say that they don’t want to discuss it then tell them that you need to discuss it so that you can move past this point.
The love isn’t there
Yup it happens; one day you are happily married and the next you can’t understand why they aren’t the same person that you married. People change, some for the better and some for the worst. There is a stage that many married couples go through after the honey moon stage wears off and this is when you both really start to settle in with one another but this also usually means more arguing and fighting with each other. If you feel that the love isn’t there you might want to take a step back and reexamine your marriage and remember why you married this person. Wouldn’t you like to get the love back that you once had with one another? Take my advice and plan for a night out just once a week to cuddle or do something romantic together without arguing or fussing. Just one night a week is all it takes to rekindle the fire of love once again.
We can’t stop fighting
Have you ever been in a crowded run and started to whisper and before too long everyone around you was whispering? The same goes for fighting. If you are fighting, start to whisper. When you whisper and they whisper your adrenaline will start to go down instead of boil and you will soon find that you are actually having a discussion instead of an argument. Fighting will lead you nowhere except for down a road to divorce. If you can’t seem to stop fighting then each of you need to write down all of your discussion topics and hand it to the other person and let them right down their statements to that discussion. Doing this will keep you from fighting but allow both parties to discuss the issue and get your points across. If you feel that you are about to fight, go into another room or leave the scene for a while. A time out can do you both some good.
We can’t work through the issues, should we get a divorce?
A divorce is now viewed as something that can be done if the couple is not getting along. Back in the olden days, divorces were almost unheard of but in today’s reality, people are getting divorces let and right. Examine the issues that you feel are forcing you to get a divorce. I can’t tell you that a divorce is the right choice and I do believe that every issue in a marriage can be worked out.
I can’t talk to my spouse anymore?
If you can’t talk then write about it and leave the letter somewhere where they will have to see it. I found this out after my husband thought that a football game was more important than talking to me about an issue that I had. It wasn’t that it was actually more important or that he felt this way but he was too into it to even notice that my lips were moving. I decided to leave a note attached to the remote control and he ended up reading it. The issue was discussed and we moved on with our lives. You might not think that he is actually listening to you but I can almost guarantee you that he hears what you are saying. A research was once done that said that you can actually play into someone’s conscience by talking to them while they are a sleep, you might want to try this out.
For more tips on dealing with marital issues, I have a ton of articles in my archives about marriage and marital bliss if you would like to check it out, check click on my name at the top. Good luck to you and your marriage.
Rosa is an author of many articles featured across the web. She majored in political science and owns her own arts and crafts business. She is a known libertarian and loves a good debate. Her articles focus… View profile