How To Deal With a Breakup or Divorce

“Acceptance of what has happened is the first step in overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.” -William James

Whoever said, “Breaking up is hard to do,” obviously had to go through it to know that it isn’t easy. When you are trying to figure out how to deal with a breakup; a lot will depend on whether or not you wanted the relationship to end or if it’s your partner that wants to end it.

If you are the one who has decided the relationship is over then it will be a lot easier for you. On the other hand, if you aren’t the one who wants the relationship to end, but your partner does, then be prepared to go through the stages of grieving.

Anyone who has gone through losing a partner can tell you that in the beginning you may not believe you will ever get beyond the heartache but know that in time you will not only survive but you will be a stronger, wiser person in the end.

Once you get past the shock and denial that your hopes and dreams with this person are gone you will move on to the first step in figuring out how to deal with a breakup or divorce which is acceptance.

Accepting the fact that your relationship really is over will help you start to pick up the pieces of your life and move on. Not accepting that it’s over will cause you to hold onto the hope that you might have a chance of getting back together.

If you choose to hang on, when the truth is smacking you in the face, you are only prolonging the inevitable. So, if you have to go through it anyway, why drag it out and hurt yourself more. No one likes being rejected and losing someone you love is a hard pill to swallow. But, unless you swallow it you will continue to choke on the pain.

Here are some of the time tested ways in learning how to deal with a breakup or divorce:

* Surround yourself with family and friends

* Don’t keep going back one more time

* Keep yourself busy doing things you enjoy

* Exercise – This one action will help you more than any other

* Travel if you can afford it

* Get your feelings out through journaling, counseling or simply talking to close friends

* Start to believe in a future again

* Learn to forgive

You will find that the more you make healthy choices and when you take the kinds of steps that will allow you to heal; it will help you to move on sooner rather than later. There really is a whole new world out there waiting for you to realize it. Don’t stay stuck so long in the grieving process that you forget that your life is waiting.

Putting your life on hold while you are healing is one thing just don’t make grieving a way of life, it’s simply not worth wasting your time. Getting to the point where you understand how to deal with a breakup or divorce will give you the inner strength to let go of the struggle and help move you toward a better future.

Are you trying to pick up the pieces of your broken heart? Susan Russo is an author and coach who has helped people from around the world move beyond heartache and pain after their breakup or divorce. Would you like to heal your heartache sooner rather than later?

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